When friendships are at their greatest, they can feel accepting, comfortable, and magical; as if you and another person had what it takes to complete
When friendships are at their greatest, they can feel accepting, comfortable, and magical; as if you and another person had what it takes to completely fill the other person’s world. People frequently tell me that they feel more seen and heard by their platonic friends than by their family, spouses, or coworkers. However, friendships become more difficult as we age, frequently causing confusion and pain. It can be challenging to know when to make an effort to stay in touch, when to give the relationship room. For all the typical ups and downs of closeness, and when to end it on an honest note.
There are many reasons why friendships end, some of which are understandable and others which are not. If you move across the nation, marry someone who holds different political beliefs from you, or go through different life stages at different times, it’s reasonable that you might lose touch. Other times, there is a lack of reciprocity that is unrelated to the circumstances. Or there aren’t enough connections being made to keep the relationship’s fabric together. It might be difficult to know whether to seek connection if you notice that you are less close to someone than you once were but are unsure of why.
Here are 5 warning indicators to watch out for to determine the status of a key friendships in your life.
1) In Friendships the person who does not criticize you
Mutual respect is the cornerstone of lasting friendships. A good buddy won’t enjoy using your decisions and way of life as a joke or punchline. Humans are prone to patterns and are frequently observed committing errors. Even the brightest minds of our generation made some poor decisions while trying to make sense of existence. A friend is probably not very beneficial for your self-esteem if they constantly rub it in your face when you make mistakes or if they take pleasure in making you look foolish in front of other people.
Such a friend would go out of their way to make you look bad, expose you, or attack you while letting people know that you are unable to “get things right” and that you require repairing. If you want to succeed and be regarded as trustworthy, you must take responsibility for the image you present to the world. This is a PR crisis waiting to happen.
2) The truthful Individual
If they hang out with us, a lot of people may consider themselves to be our friends. These individuals are eager to satisfy their wants for “something exciting to do,” “having someone to give them company,” or “listening in on them.” The presence of a friend who particularly has interest in assisting you in learning about life, picking up a new skill, kicking a bad habit, honing a craft, getting to know interesting people, adjusting to a new environment, figuring out an industry, or engaging you in a unique life experience, however, must be valued.
Such pals are more than simply warm bodies at home parties and in your selfies. These are those that value you and wish to assist you in improving the quality of your life. Never disregard such pals when they are around. Their candor and sincerity will inspire you to explore different facets of your personality and lead a fuller life.
3) Who does not divide and control your life
Possessions may develop in friendships. Such relationships are typically build on the immature and contentious notions of “ownership” over other people’s feelings and time. This is unsustainable and may be oppressive. Friends that bulldoze their agendas on you or try to have you “all to themselves” might make you very tired and frustrated.
Friends who only want to use you as a tool in their elaborate plans for their own life are likely to try to separate you from important people and find various ways to guide and control you to the fullest extent possible. If you become a “yes man” to a friend who is trying to boss and fling you around based on their whims and fancies, you may feel lured and hoaxed into circumstances that may not agree with you in the long run as a human being with feelings and a journey that you’d like to attend to with earnestness.
4) The individual who gives you room
Everyone could use a little alone and me time. If you need to refocus, just gather yourself, or take some time to consider the day, a good buddy will understand. Realistic friendships is to be built on the knowledge that everyone has good and bad days.
Everybody experiences hardship and adversity at some point in their lives. A good buddy would understand that there are times when you need to “be by yourself”. And it resolve some issues without the interruption or pressured advice of another person. A good buddy respects your needs and doesn’t try to save you when it’s not necessary.
5) The individual who is not a leech
One could notice a “taker” and a “giving” function in some friendships. This creates an imbalanced and unequal interaction between people. Ideal is a friend who treats you as a person and not just a gift card or deal. Some friends artificially create a crisis to get their friend’s attention by draining their resources. They consistently demand access to their friends’ emotional, financial, physical, and intellectual resources. They without showing any consideration for their friends’ lives, moods, values, or schedules.